open letter to the makers and marketers of Ugg (tm) boots

To who whom it may concern at the Ugg Corporation:

My hats off to you guys. Seriously. Impressive. Job well done. You all have inexplicably convinced thousands of well-heeled young women, with more money than sense apparently, that large, fuzzy, brown sheepskin boots are "cool" looking. Now, we've known since highschool that 'cool' and 'attractive' are not necessarily linked, but... for all that is good, we like to sometimes THINK they are. However, the success of your product truly flies in the face of that hope. The claim is that your shoes are comfortable. Having tried on a pair (not because I contemplated purchasing, but because I wanted to test this claim), I can only say they do not provide the support my arches desire, nor do they in any way promise protection from the windy city's wet winter sidewalks. Thus, you have accomplished something impressive. I believe Malcolm Gladwell talkes about the popularity tipping point and references a resurgence of popularity among Hush Puppies (shoes). Now, I own a pair of Hush Puppies (tm) and I can say-- these are comfortable shoes. But you all.... you have mastered the art of marketing, selling for popularity's sake and nothing else. Hats off again, and here's to you, dear makers of Ugg(ly) boots. May I never be enticed to spend $180 to wrap something so ugly, so non-functional, and so solely trendy around my pretty little ankles.
Please don't take this the wrong way. I do think getting Jen and Lindsay and Cameron and crew to wear them was just brilliant. And while I've never wished for a pair of your boots, I do wish for your stock, as I've waited through several seasons and this trend just. won't. die.
Yours in grudging admiration,
c. p.
too-cool-for-Uggs graduate student